I remember watching quite a few first episodes of shows at the onset of the Fall 2014 anime season, as I wanted to do a first impressions post on my anime blog about them all. And I notably remember dropping Shirobako, feeling I couldn’t relate at all to its characters. Now I realize that was because of the pain I felt watching others struggle towards their goals as I spun my wheels in the mud, unwilling to get out and push. My life had spiraled out of control and I had reached the nadir of my depression. The lowest point of my entire life. I was afraid of change, afraid of the past, apprehensive over my future. I was unconsciously searching for something to add color to my bleak world. So when I watched the first episode of Your Lie in April, I was immediately entranced. The images and sounds were burned into my mind as my eyes glued themselves to the screen. It was one of the most impactful experiences I have ever had with a work of art. It brought out so many painful emotions and deep seated anxieties, yet I felt something reaffirming in the subtext of the narrative. And I clung to it for dear life.
Before I knew it, against the gray fall skies, under the black curtain of my shut eyes, Your Lie In April’s narrative took root in me and bloomed anew. Over. And over. And over again. And every time my heart remembered it, it was like all the walls around me began to crumble to dust and scatter on the wind.
I could connect with the characters almost immediately. Their introductions said so much about them. Kaori was setup as an inquisitive and impulsive heroine, chasing a cat all over on an apparent whim. Kosei was reserved with no regard for himself, with some emotions clearly locked away tightly inside him. Tsubaki was overly energetic, caring, and somewhat pushy, clearly harboring feelings for Kosei. And Watari was, well he was mainly just a play-boy in episode 1.
The way that Kosei shrank within himself and didn’t go out of his way to communicate with other people was just like me. The way he had an inner monologue, making observations, but not able to get at the heart of what he wanted to say was something I had also felt. The whole atmosphere of the show was perfect for me. It took the shape of a brightly colored fantasy that still existed within the real world. Just enough to escape on with just enough to connect to. And just as Kaori gripped Kosei’s hand and pulled him along on the epic journey of self-discovery and growing up that was about to begin, the symphony of color and sound that was Your Lie In April seized my very soul, and plucked me up in a flurry of feathers.
Well now that tears are threatening to fall into my coffee I think that is where I want to end this post. I know as part of the Twelve days of anime we are talking about impactful anime-related moments from this year and this seems more like a pure retrospective, but I decided to write it upon rewatching the first two episodes of Your Lie In April last week as I have been doing a lot of reflecting on what anime I love and why. I hope this post conveys least 1% of the emotion that the show left me with. If so then I’ve done what I set out to do. This post is almost entirely just my emotions, but I plan to do a long-form analysis of this series in the future (sometime in January if my plans work out) so stick around if you want to see that.
VasA’s Twelve Days of Anime, Day Two: Remembering Your Lie In April
By the way, if you don’t know me, then hey I’m VasA and thanks for stopping by! See you next time.
Registration Form to sign up (this year’s registration is now closed): https://goo.gl/vSs3vn
Survival Pack: https://goo.gl/z9XRj4
Database of Participants: https://goo.gl/cMrE7z